My weekend, and it's quick turn south.
on 2002-11-17 at 6:25 p.m. Alright, having a mediocre weekend. Yesterday could not have gone better, overall I mean. The day was a nasty, cold, rainy, dreary day, and I spent at least 6 hours out in the elements. How could this day end well you ask, well my team won, 14-9. UVA beat up on the NCSU Wolfpack, and now are bowl eligible for the first time since 1999. Great day, I don't care what the weather was like. I got home, showered, and was ready to go out when it hit me, the tragic beast called exhaustion. I was fine right up to the second my ass hit the far right side of the sofa and my right index finger hit the "on" button for the digital cable. I had been watching ESPN the night before and that was what came up. I saw the highlites of the game, and a few other games. Then continuing along the list of my favorite channels (I LOVE DIGITAL CABLE) I hit upon the first Harry Potter Movie. Having just seen the second one, I was mesmerized and did not change channels for three hours. I have it on DVD, but it was so convenient for it to just appear when I needed it. Almost like someone at the cable company was like "I bet Jonzo will come home tired from the game and want to just zone out for a couple hours, we should throw Harry Potter on." cornflakegirl and I were supposed to eat dinner, but I cancelled on her, I have to make it up tonight by doing Dinner and Harry Potter II again. It's cool, cause the movie is good, and FREE!! Sometime during my zoned out evening I ordered pizza, delivered by the Papa John's Lady, and not the Stalker guy (I'll explain later). And onebluegreen called me to stay on the phone while she checked out some suspicious noise outside her house. She's prone to overreact after some recent events at her house involving a drunk, a telephone, a crying woman, and a loaded weapon. You'll have to read her diary for the details. (You liked that didn't you, I'm learning.) She told me to call 911 if anything happened to her. Here's a fictitional re-enactment of my hypothetical 911 call:

911: "This is 911, can I help You?"

Me: "Well no, but my friend needs help."

911: "What's the problem?"

Me: "I'm not exactly sure."

911: "Explain the situation."

Me: "Well, she heard a suspicious noise, called me so she would have me on the phone in case something happened, and I think something happened."

911: "What happened?"

Me: "Fuck if I know, can you send someone out there?"

911: "Where?"

Me: "(Insert address here)" (By the way, you don't know how lucky you are, I actually typed your full address here and didn't think it was a bad idea until the last minute, then went back and deleted it. I don't know what I was thinking.)

911: "Okay, we've sent an officer, but since you live in the city, and called the Roanoke 911, we had to call Vinton to find out that (insert address here) is actually in Bedford County. Their volunteer Police force is all out on vacation and will be able to swing by there on the way back to the station Monday, we should know something in a couple days. We'll keep you informed. Thank you for calling 911." click.

Me: "Oh yeah, she does live in Bumfuck."

Turns out all this was unneccessary cause the noise was easily explained, but I still think about what exactly the 911 person would say and how long it would take to get out there. I probably could have gotten there faster on my own.

That was yesterday, a weird, cold, wet, but overall satisfying day. Today is a whole other beast. I got up early this morning to let the dog out to do her business. It was rather cold and wet and I planned on going back to bed, so I waited on her. I have no heat still, and a 75 lb. dog can definitely produce some heat, she's like a whole extra blanket, and she likes being inside anyway, so back to bed we went. About three hours later I woke up to some god awful noise. The dog was snoring, she's almost a year old, and save a few random trips out of town and a few nights she stayed outside at the old homestead, she's slept in my bed every night. I've never heard her snore before now, and we're not talking a cute little dog snore, we're talking a windows rattling, curtains flapping kinda snore. Hideous. Needless to say she is headed outside, but I can't get her up, so I hit the shower, figuring the noise from my Radio in the bathroom will wake her up. Nope, of course not, she's still not getting up, but when I finally make her get up, she fights it, I throw on "around the house" clothes, and finally I drag her down the stairs, through the kitchen and out the back door. As she is quite krafty, and smart, I have to chain her to a dog run, she could easily jump the 4 foot fence in my backyard. So as I'm headed out to the run as I have every morning for the past 5 months, I'm wearing my Pajama bottoms with the snowmen from Old Navy, a grey shirt and my birkenstocks. My birkenstocks are 8 years old and have seen better days, with little to no tread and very slippery soles. I hit a mud patch and go for a slippery ride, right towards the pole that holds the end of the dog run, and as I try to turn while sliding, my foot finally catches and shoots me over on my butt and cracks my head in the 4" by 4" post. Yeah, so I'm cold, wet, muddy, and I've just cracked my head, and the dog is just sitting there. I inspect myself, thank God my head is just bruised, my pants and shirt just muddy, and I go back inside, all while forgetting the dog is still out there, not chained up. I head to the laundry room, to take off my muddy clothes and wash my muddy feet. So I'm standing there butt naked, with mud covering my feet and ankles, when there is scratching at the door. Immediately it hits me what it is, but I have no clean clothes right there in the laundry, and I know if I don't get to the door quick she'll run play in the neighborhood which is real close to some busy streets. I've just taken a rather vicious blow to the head, and my only answer is to just run to the door, open it, and let the dog in quickly, surely no one will see? So I haul ass to the door, and she's headed out into the front yard as I swing the door open. I call to her and she turns and runs, and just as I swing the door open to let her in, my Neighbor's boyfriend opens the front door, and there I am butt naked. I waved, a slammed the door. I don't associate with those people except to pay the kid to mow my grass, but now I know they think I'm weird. Not that I care, but still not something I want to perpetuate. I had to take another shower, take the dog out again, and head to work. That's where I am now, with a sore head, and a nice new story for my grandkids, or Sara's grandkids, whatever. So Saturday gets an A, and today gets a D- (It could always be worse). The weekend balances out to a high C, which I'll take, but I'll hope for a better one next week.

Don- I hope this girls a nice one, and I'm sorry If I seemed overly worried. You're both grown ups and you know what you are doing. I've read some of her stuff, and she seems truely nice. More power to both of you. Maybe you won't get to 300 days.

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Recent Entries:

Prodigal Jonzo Returns - 2005-09-16

Sober - 2004-02-12

Long time, and Happy Anniversary - 2003-12-08

Getting you up to date... - 2003-11-21

Welcome Home Richard - 2003-11-12

Wisdom tells me I'm Nothing.
Love tells me I'm Everything.
Between the two my life flows.
~Nisargadatta

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